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Well, Brandon made the decision. We discussed it... debated it... fought about it... laughed about it...
And then I waited... for a day... for a week... for a month... for 40 odd days, I didn't mention anything. It's his decision now. I don't want him blaming me for pressuring him into a decision. I planned for staying. I planned for going. I waited.
Two night ago, we talked:
Brandon: "Well, shouldn't we start looking for apartments?"
Brandy: (hesitantly) "Where?"
"In Tennessee"
"really?"
"yeah"
"why?"
"I hate my job, I have no married friends, I want to go to a smaller school, UGA is too expensive."
"Lee would be more so."
"Yeah, but not by that much."
"Is this your final decision?"
"Yeah."
"You know I'd learn to be happy no matter where we go."
"I don't want you to have to learn happiness."
"I'll be happy if I'm with you. I was really getting used to the idea of staying in Georgia. There are a lot of pro's"
"Nah, we're going to Tennessee."
I'm not so sure what I think about this.
A month ago, I knew I wanted to go!!! I begged him to go! I said his friends hated me. I said his family smothered me. I said I would always consider Tennessee home.
Then I said I love him. I said I will follow him wherever he wants to go. I said I would submit to his decision.
And I waited.
But while I waited, I started thinking from his perspective.
Our life-long friends are here (most of them).
Our families are here.
Where do we go if our cars break down?
We have steady jobs here.
Grandparents are here should the little Brand's pop out.
Maybe Georgia is better. Maybe we should stay here.
But now that the decision is made, it doesn't matter. We're going.
I have mixed emotions.
Mainly though, I'm excited.
I do love Tennessee.
I miss the people incredibly.
I miss the feel and warmth of that wonderful campus!!
It was so inspirational. Even a couple weeks ago when I went to visit, it felt like home...like more of a home than the one I grew up in
The only thing that was missing was Brandon.
Now, I get to go home... with Brandon... And that whole other life that I had without him, will now become part of him. And he will become part of it. And our life will officially start together.
There will no longer be "your friends" and "my friends." There will be "our friends."
Our life.
Our family.
Our home.
God, I can't wait!