GUHL - you betta' watch OUT!
I had an interesting night at church tonight.
Only 12 students since the bus ministry stopped.
That's right.
We went from averaging 60 (with as many as 80) kids to an average of 15.
While it's not every pastor's dream, it certainly is mine... at least for a while.
I wouldn't mind having a few more, but I'm happy right now.
One of my students asked if she could do our opening prayer tonight, but being distracted by the girl sitting next to her who wouldn't stop talking, her prayer went something like this:
Jeeeeesus, I just pray - GUHL! YOU BETTA' SHUT UP!! - Jeeesus, I just pray that you help us PAY ATTENTION tonight and I thank you for my pretty clothes, and I thank you for food, and I thank you for my mama's spankin' that I got this afternoon 'cause I know it will help me be a good guhl. I pray that SOME PEOPLE's mamas will spank them so they won't talk durin' my turn to pray. - GUHL! I'm talkin' 'bout YOU! You betta' watch out! - In Jeeeesus name. Amen."
All I can say is that, if I were Jesus, I would LOVE that prayer and find its innocent sincerity endearing.
But since I'm not Jesus, and since I'm just a children's pastor in need of some humor, I couldn't help myself - I laughed.
I tried not to. But, c'mon. You can't tell me you didn't just laugh when reading that! It's funny!
So, in the midst of trying to counsel a distraught single mom of an out-of-control boy, and trying to tell my ADHD kid for the 100th time that, yes, he DOES have to sit in his chair and no, he may NOT stand on it and sing the Star Spangled Banner that he just learned at school today, and trying to explain to my kindergarten students why fasting makes us grow closer to God, I was able to find a reason to thank the Lord for this job. Because, GUHL, you know I won't find any humor like that sitting behind a desk.