Pay Attention to Meeeeeee!
Hm.
I know I'm not crazy.
Last night, this alignment was left.
What happened?
Anyways...
B and I are looking into buying another duplex... a bigger one.
We'll see.
It has a much higher mortgage payment, with not much higher rent.
So, I'm waiting to hear from the lendor, to see if we can lower the monthly payment.
How cool will it be to have TWO properties?
Eh?
Yeah, very exciting.
But, again, we'll see.
I'm just praying... praying that we don't make a stupid mistake here... praying that we don't borrow ourselves into a hole.
But we'll see.
We still need more information... about the neighborhood, the neighbors themselves, the loan, the rent, the current tenants... all that good stuff.
But today is just day one.
We shall see what day 2 holds.
We shall. We shall.
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In other news... I realized why B was feeling the way he was... or at least acting the way he was...
You see... it wasn't mean. It was... teasing... supposed to be lighthearted... but I can tell where there is something else there... a nuggett of truth behind the playful smile...
At one point last night, I said, "I'm going in the other room. Do NOT come in there until you are ready to be nice to me."
Then, when bedtime rolled around, he walked in the room and "teased."
*hmph*
So I crawled into bed, and determined that I would NOT get upset. Besides, like I said, he wasn't being mean... just... not himself... his normal adorably sweet self.
I didn't even have to ask before he immediately snuggled up to me... really close... like he wanted to be as close as he possibly could.
So I put my arms around him while he laid his head on my chest. We talked for a long time... I can't even remember about what... and I scratched his head and played with his hair... and he kissed my forearm that was wrapped around him.
And I think that is all he needed... to know that he could still be held... and be loved... and that his place in my arms won't change... despite everything else in the world that is changing.
And so, after a little more than cuddling *wink*... I made a decision... or a committment rather... to myself.
I will hold him more.
Sure, he can still hold me, as I love to be held, and as I absolutely cannot live without his arms around me.
But I am determined to remember that everybody... including a strong man like him... needs to be held every now and then.
They need something warm, and familiar, and steady.
And I will be that place for him... as often as I can.
So he won't have to "tease" in order to get my attention... because he already has it.
No baby is here yet... and I am already having to learn balance.