Choosing Joy
I need to go work on my paper some more, but I thought I would do another update while I'm in the mood (and while I feel like procrastinating a little longer).
It has come to my attention that I complain too much about this new job.
Here are the facts:
It is the most difficult job I have ever had.
When I first came, people didn't like me being there.
The youth pastor fails to communicate with me about very important changes he is making that affect the children's ministry.
I am short of volunteers.
I am reminded every day that I am totally not capable of doing this job.
BUT
There have also been some amazing things that the Lord has done.
He told me to go to the deacon board, during the church's time of financial tightening, and ask for thousands of dollars for my ministry. They all agreed to give it to me.
He told me that He was going to start sending me people that didn't seem to fit in anywhere else who will find their niche in children's ministry.
So far, five have come to me asking if they could help.
He is giving me strategies about how to protect and build the ministry (like Nehemiah protected and built the walls of Jerusalem).
While we haven't been able to implicate them, I am excited to see the results that will come from them.
He has sent people into my life to speak encouragement and prophetic words.
He really has been good.
The main thing I am working on right now is time management. I am trying to carry a notebook around with me all the time and write down everything that I commit to do, right when I do it.
I asked AB about how she keeps track of everything, and she said she does the same thing. So maybe it will help me.
Also, I am continuing to pray about how to use my time.
Should there be certain days when I do nothing but church stuff? And then days when I do nothing but work on my home? What about school? Or should I break my days into times? Like: church time, school time, home time.
I just don't know about that stuff.
In the beginning, all I thought about was church stuff, and it completely wore me out.
Then I learned to stop thinking about church stuff. The problem was that I stopped completely. I forgot to do a lot of stuff for the church that I had committed to do because everytime church stuff popped into my mind, I would push it away.
I just need to learn a balance.
I need to find a way to be wife, mother, daughter, pastor, friend, student, etc.
I am also recognizing that I need to give some things up. I'm not sure what they are, but I am praying for the Lord to show me. I am trying to do too much, and that is part of the reason I feel so overwhelmed all the time.
So, I am writing this to apologize to all of you if I have done nothing but complain since taking this job.
I am trying to determine to be happy.
I've heard that said before, and I didn't really understand it.
But I think I get it now. I'm trying to choose joy.
So... I'm not saying I won't complain any more... I just don't want to be like the Israelites who saw the Red Sea part and then complained about not being in Egypt.
So. Yeah. That's all I'm going to write tonight.
I have a lot more... a lot that the Lord has been showing me in Nehemiah. But that will have to wait for another time.
I have to go work on my paper now.
Boooo.
I mean... no complaining...
Yay!!
Aw, shucks, I can't fake this one.
Boooooooo for the paper!
hehe... ok... choosing joy, starting now.
Seriously.
Now.