A failure in life
I'm struggling these days with... well... everything.
I look at my life and I realize, I am failing. I'm failing at everything. And I can't tell if it's because my willpower is too low or my standards are too high.
But there are women out there who do it, right?
There are women who work and stay thin and love their kids and appreciate their husbands and succeed at work and keep their house clean and cook healthy meals.
There are women who do all that, right?
So why not me? I'm driven. I'm of average intelligence. I know how to work hard. I know how to set and reach goals.
At work, I have a reputation for being the person who gets sh*t done. I might be a b*tch about it in the process, but it gets done.
Why can't I be like that in life?
Why can't I keep my family and my home and my weight managed?
In life, I lose my glasses every other day. In life, my kids eat pizza or McDonalds more than I care to tell anyone. In life, I eat whenever I feel any emotion at all - happiness, anger, depression. You name it, I'll eat for it.
In life, my housework nags at the back of my mind forever and always. In life, I am never enough - or I am too much - for my husband.
In life, I am a failure.
And that sucks.
I don't have any grand plans to change any of these things this week. But this I do know: I need to get in the Word.
I need to be defined by something other than what I'm not capable of doing.
I need the truth, and not the circumstances, to change my perspective.
So I'm not setting any big goals. I'm just planning to spend a little time with Jesus.