Fools rush in... I'm running full speed
Well, classes started last week. Not too bad...
In three out of my five classes, we have spent a large portion of time discussing the meaning of the word "egocentrism." Apparently, it's a real flaw in the thought process of most Americans. Hmmm...
It's pretty awesome how the Lord answers my questions before I even know I'm going to ask them:
For the past couple months, I have continually felt led to read 1 Corinthians Chapters 1-5. (Not all in one sitting, I started with chapter 1 and little by little progressed to chapter 5.) The reason it took me so long was that the Lord instructed me not to just read it, but also to meditate and dwell on it. So some nights I would just read one verse, and it would be enough to knock my socks off!
The parts that were especially potent were the ones that talked about the "foolishness of the cross" and the "wisdom of the world." How these two things are flip-flopped once you become a Christian. "For Christ became wisdom" through His death, and true "wisdom" of the cross only comes through "revelation of the Holy Spirit." (Of course this is my paraphrase of what the Spirit was revealing.)
So, in two of my classes this semester, we discuss "critical thinking." How to think logically, reasonable, and objectively about a subject. However, they focus primarily on objectively. They talk about not being "egocentric." Meaning, don't say, "This is true because it is what I believe or because it is what I experience... because it is what I have been taught, or because I have always beleived it."
The classes emphasize self-criticism and self-analysis to discover which beliefs we have that are "narrow minded" and may affect our judgements.
And, inevitably, one teacher mentioned "religion."
So... naturally, I began to think about my own "religion." Not that I am doubting, oh no. I have been down that road. I have experienced life without God, without Jesus. No thank you.
Rather, I was thinking, "How am I to defend my spiritual beliefs in this class?"
You see... I don't know all the "scientific facts" about the existence of God. I don't know dates, names, and places of martyrs and missionaries that have "proven" Jesus Christ. I don't know what sets Christianity apart from Islam and Buddhism, other than this...
Jesus Christ saved my life. I know He saved me from Hell and all that... but it's more than that. He saved me from a life of misery, from suicide, from depression, from hatred, from unforgiveness... from myself. He saved me, rescued me, bought me with His life. I know it sounds like a bunch of cliche's, but THAT is truth.
Truth is not whatever people want it to be, based on their background, upbringing, beliefs, etc. The TRUTH is that Jesus saved my life. And He died to save everyone's.
So... now that I'm off my soap box, what does this have to do with my classes?
If you remember from before my extended diatribe above... I was worried about how I could defend my beliefs from an "objective, rational, reasonable, non-egocentric" way.
And the bottom line... I can't. That is what the Lord has been showing me all summer, and I didn't even realize it. He was preparing me for this crossroad.
The cross is FOOLISHNESS to the perishing. It makes no sense. I can't look at it from an objective viewpoint. That would be the equivalent of asking a person who was just saved from a burning building to "objectively" judge the worth of the fireman that rescued her.
I can't be rational when it comes to my faith. How is it rational to fully trust a God that I cannot see with my eyes, hear with my ears, or touch with my hands? To believe that the God who holds the expanse of the universe between his thumb and forefinger also resides in my spirit, guiding me through my day-to-day?
And egocentric? Of course it is. I don't believe because of what other told me or because of physical evidence. I believe because I have experienced it. I personally know the God of the universe. He has changed my life and saved my world. THAT is what I know is truth. No doubt about it.
So... I will go to class tomorrow with new resolve. Not to defend my beliefs with eloquence and scientific reasoning. Rather, I will go with the understanding of what my beliefs are to this world... foolishness.
I know who I am, more than ever.