cut the grass!
So I don't know how to be the kind of wife that my counselor says my husband needs.
I'm just not sure I can do it.
As I discussed before, she says I am trying to do too much. I have not let Brandon have enough responsibility in our relationship and in our home. I need to start asking him to do more so he can feel more needed. And then, once I ask him, I need to let him do it in his own way.
That is a lot harder than it sounds.
I asked my husband last Tuesday to get a gallon of milk.
As of Thursday, he hadn't gotten any yet.
So, Thursday night he took a trip to the grocery store to "cool down" mid-fight.
Last Monday, a neighborhood kid came and asked if he could cut our grass. I said I would have to ask my husband.
B said not to pay the kid, but that he would do it on his day off.
His day off was last Thursday, and he did not do it.
Another neighborhood kid has come by twice to ask if he could cut our grass. The first time (Friday, I think) B told him to come back after the rain, and we might ask him to do it then. So he came back on Sunday, and B said that we weren't going to use him this time.
So the kid's uncle (our neighbor) is outside as I'm leaving my house this morning. He says, "Don't you want my nephew to cut your grass? He can have it done before you get home from work today."
Now, I guess I don't have to tell you that, by this point, I was past embarrassed.
So I said to him, "I would if I could. But my husband says he's going to do it; so I am going to wait for him to do it."
I can't remember what else was said after that because I started looking around at our yard.
Since the rain over the weekend, our grass has grown to past 12" tall in some areas.
How embarrassing is that?!? We are, by far, the most redneck couple on the block.
And so, in lieu of what happened last week (i.e. asking him to do it in his own time, and him not doing it at all) I called him on my way to work today.
I said, "Hey, our neighbor came and asked me AGAIN if we wanted our grass cut. Do you want me to just pay him the $20 to do it?"
He said, "No, we are really tight right now, and that is a waste of money."
I said, "So, are YOU going to do it?"
He said, "Yeah."
I said, "When? I know you have a soft ball game tonight. So can you do it tomorrow?"
He said, "Well, I have basketball. But I GUESS I can TRY to squeeze it in."
I said, "Well, if not tomorrow, then can you do it Wednesday?"
He said, "Fine. I'll do it Wednesday after work."
I said, "Thanks, sweetie."
He said, "uh huh" and hung up.
*grrrrr*
So I called back, "Why did you hang up on me?!"
I won't go into the whole thing, but basically, I asked "Am I asking too much of you? All I'm asking is that you cut the grass! Is that unreasonable?!"
He said I was being demanding and making him do in when **I** wanted him to.
I said I asked him a week ago, and he didn't do it.
He said he never remembered me asking him.
So... according to what I talked with FB about last week, I need to just accept that he's not going to cut the grass as often as I like and be okay with a yard that looks like the African savanna.
I'm just not sure if I can do that.
It's going to take a lot of prayer on my part.
Stopping on the way home to get a gallon of milk takes, what?, five minutes! With a baby in tow, it would take me half an hour! Am I asking too much?
*sigh*
This might take longer than I thought.
I'm done.
Can't talk about this any more.